“Post-Modern Man,” by Professor Rex f. Beuter Perkins
Heads I win, tails you lose
Only gonna watch Fox News
I don't believe the liberal media
I don't trust biased academia
I wanna drill baby drill
Though it won't lower prices
Voter fraud, welfare queens
Another manufactured crisis
Keep government outta my Medicare
Always room for another Red Scare
Impeach Bill Clinton for a blow job
Peace Prize to Bush for starting war
Gotta cut government size and waste
Guns and bombs? More more more
It's always right if my side does it
I'll flip flop daily to stand by that
He he's a post modern man
A Bill O'Reilly fan
Don't believe in truth
Don't believe the proof
Has his own set of facts
Always grinds on that axe
His philosophy is beer
His currency is fear
I'm religious and I'm right
I'm old and I'm white
I wish I was rich
My wife is a bitch
At least she knows her place
My friends are all one race
Black people scare me
I don't like Mexicans near me
Asians sure are bright
I love my Coors light
I shop at Wal-Mart
Love jokes about farts
Bomb 'em back to the Stone Age
I can't contain by misplaced rage
Nobody stands up for white rights
Look at me wrong, we're gonna fight
He he's a post modern man
A Bill O'Reilly fan
Don't believe in truth
Don't believe the proof
Has his own set of facts
Always grinds on that axe
His philosophy is beer
His currency is fear
I love steers and beers
I hate fucking queers
I only eat potatoes and meat
I think NASCAR is really neat
I think Jesus was an American
The Founding Fathers were Republicans
The Constitution outlaws all Dems
We should imprison all the libs
I vote against my economic interest
In Ronald Reagan we trust
It's my country, love it or leave it
I hate any handout, unless I receive it
Since JFK won, this country has stunk
You socialist, Nazi, pinko punk
Don't you talk about my president that way
Your president is a commie Muslim gay
He he's a post modern man
A Bill O'Reilly fan
Don't believe in truth
Don't believe the proof
Has his own set of facts
Always grinds on that axe
His philosophy is beer
His currency is fear