“Yet Another Song About Weed,” by Professor Rex
Weed...for lack of a better word...is good
I like big buds and I cannot lie
Weed's never done nothing to you but make you high
Make your brain multiply
You don't die, you fly, not with wings
But with dreams and schemes
If ya doing it right
Not of bling and fancy things
But of corporate kings
Your hope springs, eternal
Battling with the infernal
If you do it right, not the internal
You might be munching on the Colonel
Or spinning the turn...table
If you do it right, you turn the tables
Creating new fables
Getting unstable and unable to
Stop singing another weed song
Stop pulling another weed bong
Dope, green, gage, ganja, grass
You wanna roll with me, you gotta love the cannabis
Stop singing another weed song
Stop pulling another weed bong
Dope, green, gage, ganja, grass
You wanna roll with me, you gotta love the cannabis
I'm so snizzy, they call me snotty
Hit that switch and beam me up Scotty
Get the paper towels, cause I'm making spills
I'm rolling joints while you're popping pills
Hallucinating, ain't no debating
Sizziling, like Kevin Bacon
Getting baked, ride the snake
This shit ain't shitty, it's so so strong
They sent Chong away for too fucking long
All he did was sell a fucking bong
How the fuck do you think that that shit is fair?
Come on, come on, answer the question Clare?
Oh dear, I'm clear like a Scientologist
Getting kinda buggy like an etymologist
Getting kinda rocked like a geologist
Getting kinda deep like a marine biologist
Stop singing another weed song
Stop pulling another weed bong
Dope, green, gage, ganja, grass
You wanna roll with me, you gotta love the cannabis
Stop singing another weed song
Stop pulling another weed bong
Dope, green, gage, ganja, grass
You wanna roll with me, you gotta love the cannabis
I'm flipping your shit
Like Yoda on space crack
Trying to spot the Enterprise
In the opening of Star Trak
Take a hit, then write a hit
Last week I was on my other, other shit
Does the Prof hit the pipe like he should?
Does the fucking Pope take a fucking shit in the woods?
Does Tim Burton always fail to deliver the goods?
Does the KKK look stupid in those stupid fucking hoods?
Do DeGrasse Tyson's words get misunderstood
Time to get high and watch that Cosmos
Follow me pronto and we'll go get some tacos
Hit that combo and fulfill my utmost
Figure out how to get high with osmosis
I've had the most and it's almost time to
Stop singing another weed song
Stop pulling another weed bong
Dope, green, gage, ganja, grass
You wanna roll with me, you gotta love the cannabis
Stop singing another weed song
Stop pulling another weed bong
Dope, green, gage, ganja, grass
You wanna roll with me, you gotta love the cannabis
I'll give you my one-hitter when you pry it from my cold, dead hands.